Supporting Grief and Loss (Head Start Heals - Frequently Asked Questions) National Center on Early Childhood Health and Wellness

Description:

Q. What actions or steps should I take to comfort a preschooler whose parent has died? What is my role as teacher if a child experiences death in the family?

Bereaved preschoolers need extra connection with caring adults during such a lonely time in their lives. Teachers have an important role in supporting the child and surviving family members by helping establish normal routines and activities. They may want to tell this story many times because it relieves some of the hurt. You do not need to have something special to say. You just need to show interest, sit close, listen quietly, and validate their feelings. You can say things like, “You really miss your mommy”, or “It was so much fun to take walks with grandpa”, or “Your daddy loved you so much.”

Just listening is an important gift. Encourage the child to bring in a picture if he/she would like to. Provide extra opportunities for creative play and artistic expression, since many children will tell their “story” through play.

Make sure that someone in the program spends extra time over several weeks with the surviving parent to give them a chance to talk, too, and answer questions about how to respond to the child’s needs at home. Perhaps, they can create a memory box, or include the child in rituals like lighting memorial candles or drawing pictures, consistent with their culture and family traditions.

More questions and additional resources are provided.